Friday Fiction - Nikki Young Writes

I Don’t Want To Be Your Ghost – Friday Fiction

This week, my Friday Fiction post is based on a prompt I found. Like a previous post I wrote, the inspiration comes from a song, only this time, it is the title of the song from which the prompt is based. Here it is in full:

Your prompt this week is to take the following phrases “Didn’t want to be your ghost, Didn’t want to be anyone’s ghost” from the song Anyone’s Ghost (The National) and turn these two lines into the foundation for a short story or a poem.You can use an abbreviated version of the lyrics for the title, or you can embed part of the lyrics in the work you’re writing, or you can just incorporate the ideas contained in the lyrics in your short story or poem.

Here is my piece, based on this prompt:

I’m sorry I had to leave you. I didn’t want to go, but I couldn’t fight it any longer. I know you are hurting. I feel it too. The pain of leaving you hurt so much more than the pain of death itself.

I want you to remember me with a smile and with love and happiness in your heart. Don’t look for me every time a curtain flaps in the wind or a door creaks. It’s not me, I’m no longer with you. I know you’d like to think that I am, but it can’t be. I don’t want to be your ghost. I don’t want to be anyone’s ghost, so promise me you won’t spend the rest of your life looking over your shoulder.

Remember how much I loved life. I loved the beauty and calm of the early morning sunrise, watching as flowers slowly unfurled and turned their heads towards the warmth and light of the sun; listening as the birds began to go about their day, their morning chorus echoing through the trees.

Every spring I marvelled at the flurry of activity in our garden as the wild animals prepared for the arrival of their offspring. I admired the calm and composed young mothers caring for their young with a maturity far beyond their years. I never considered that the following year, those young would return as parents themselves, their own parents having left this world. This is how nature works: the circle of life is continuous.

When I became a mother, I didn’t consider that my own circle was nearing completion. I had always thought of my life as a line; one that I would walk until there was no more left. In my mind that line was long and I couldn’t see the end. But just like the animals of the wild, I was put on this earth for a purpose and once I had fulfilled it, my time was over.

Appreciate all the life that surrounds you. Every living creature, every tree, every plant, they all breathe. Life is for the living, not the dead. I am not a part of that anymore. I loved my life and I loved to live. It hurts to have left all that behind, but I have to move on too. I have to come to terms with a life I can no longer lead.

Look to the future, now. Look at our children. They are part of me and I live on through them. They need you more than ever and I know it’s hard, but I need you to be strong for them.

Know that I will love you for all eternity. Take that love and hold it close, then go live your life. Make this your one promise to me so that I will be able to rest in peace. Goodbye my love. I know one day we will be together again but I won’t wish for it to be anytime soon. I will wait patiently for you and look forward to hearing of all the wonderful and exciting things you have experienced in my name.


Nikki Young Writes
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Comments (0)

  1. Pingback: Some people are more equal than others | Emily Organ, writer

  2. Funky Wellies 17th October 2014 at 2:26 pm

    I found your beautifully written piece very moving, Nicola.
    Thanks for sharing. xx

  3. Emily Organ 17th October 2014 at 8:39 pm

    Almost crying reading this! Very emotional and beautifully written.

  4. dadbloguk 19th October 2014 at 2:09 pm

    Very well written. Love the sentiment and emotion expressed here. Very sad, but equally positive and forward looking.

    • Nicola Young 19th October 2014 at 2:25 pm

      Thanks. I don’t normally do prompts as I have loads of other ideas going round in my head and don’t have room to think about new ones. But this one sparked my interest, so I thought I’d give it a go.

  5. deskmonkeymummy 21st October 2014 at 9:08 pm

    Oh, the sadness. I thought this was from a parent to their child, then I read “look at our children” and my heart did that little achey thing. I like that you’ve taken the opposite view from the one we normally see when we think about love and loss. You can feel the love coming from the last paragraph.

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